Quoting:
KhelderI note that the bonus part is 8 days late.
Please also note the following safety hazard:
This thread has been BUMPED!
![Wink [;)]](/Emoticons/wink.gif)
Damn, I have been found out! Curse you Khelder!
Only Kidding
Yes it is late, but now it is here and it come with Cake
*Hands out cake*
Plus any beverage of your choice
*Hands out drinks for all ages and tastes*
Next chapter will be here when it's here.
As always, enjoy
![Happy [:)]](/Emoticons/happy.gif)
We now interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you…
The 30th Episode of Telemnar’s Tale Cast Party!
Demon: ‘Hey what are we doing here? We’re at the top of the page instead of down the bottom.’
Beardy: ‘We’re at the cast party to celebrate our project making it to its 30th chapter.’
Demon: ‘But I can’t see anything!’
Beardy: ‘That’s because you’ve got your eyes closed’
Demon: ‘Oh yeah…’
Beardy: *Sigh* ‘First off the author would like to take a moment out to thank everyone who’s stuck with the project up till this point. We may have experienced a rather unorganized update schedule but that’s because the author has had everything in life thrown at him except hell and high water.’
Demon: ‘What’s wrong with hell and high water?’
Beardy: ‘Well basically, thanks for sticking with us and I hope you’re all enjoying the story. Special thanks to Ammy and Solar who helped the author start this story in the beginning, and their continual support to this day. Of course thanks also go out to the readers and I hope you stay with us to see where this story will take us.’
Demon: ‘We’re also supposed to say…Oh look a buffet!’ *disappears*
Beardy: *Deeper Sigh*’...We’d also like to send our best wishes to Mr. Interviewer who was tragically injured in our behind the scenes special.’
Demon: *reappears, arm laden with cocktail sausages* ‘You can say that again, remember when he caught fire and ran around the set screaming for ten minutes?’
Beardy: ‘Yes…’
Demon: *Laughing* ‘Or when Gaia took a dump on him to put it out and that just caught fire as well, along with half the set?’
Beardy: ‘Yes Demon…’
Demon: *Holding his sides* ‘Or when the gods put it all out with a water miracle, but then a electric light got knocked over and he got fried before one of the smoldering backdrops fell on him?’
Beardy: ‘Demon that’s enough!’ *Coughs nervously* ‘Yes, well we all wish Mr. Interviewer a speedy recovery.’
Demon: *mouth half full of party food* ‘Beardy?’
Beardy: ‘Yes Demon?’
Demon: ‘I’ve been meaning to ask, why are all those people standing by the table specially set up in the dark and suspicious corner with no lighting?
Beardy: ‘Ah, those would be the spoiler characters, people who have yet to come into the story.’
Demon: ‘But no one can see them here.’
Beardy: ‘Yes, but its part of their contract that they must remain dark and mysterious before they are revealed in the main storyline.’
Demon: *Yelling* ‘Dirty freeloaders; keep your mitts off the grub until you’ve done some work!’
Beardy: ‘Why don’t we go talk to some of the other guests now?’
Demon: ‘But who’s the guy who needs to see the dentist, or maybe a vet?’
Beardy: ‘Shh…you’ll spoil it for the readers!’
Demon: ‘Oh, sorry’
Beardy: ‘Ignore him readers, he’s not talking about anyone of anything in the story, honest’
Demon: ‘You know that lying is supposed to be my bit right?’
Beardy: *Coughs* ‘Moving on…’
Demon: ‘Hey Aurorus!’
*Flies over to where Aurorus is sitting quietly in the corner talking to Wacipi*
Aurorus: ‘Yes?’
Demon: ‘What’s this Key to the Fallen Star business about?’
Aurorus: ‘Why are you asking me? I have nothing to do with that part of the story; I’m too busy defending our borders from Melfice’s invaders. In fact there is a very important part to the story where I…’
Demon: ‘Yeah yeah shut your trap. I’m sure your part of the story is very important; even though you currently have no contact with the real story whatsoever. So I’m just going to go over here and talk to some other people, ok?’
*Under his breath* ‘you loser…’
*Beardy spots Ajaka walking by, a row of sandwiches hanging off his possessed sword*
Beardy: ‘Ah mister Ajaka sir, may we have a word?’
Ajaka: ‘What do you want?’
Beardy: ‘I was wondering if you’d be so kind as to shed some light on the upcoming storyline.’
Ajaka: *Smiling* ‘Alright, but it’ll cost you’
Demon: ‘How much?’
Ajaka: ‘Your immortal soul!’
Demon: ‘Will Beardy’s do?’
Beardy: ‘Demon!’
Demon: ‘’What, it’s evil, it’s what I do!’
Beardy: ‘Thank you mister Ajaka, but I think we’ll try someone else’
Ajaka: *Shrugs* ‘Your loss’
Demon: ‘Forget that Beardy, check out Melfice on the dance floor!’
Beardy: ‘Who knew that someone so evil would be such a good dancer?’
*Sausage roles and celebratory cake sail overhead*
Beardy: ‘You know Demon; I think this party is starting to get a little out of hand’
Demon: ‘What makes you say that?’
Beardy: ‘Well they’ve started flinging food, and a fight has broken out in the shadowy corner of yet to be revealed characters.’
*A tray of quiches hit Beardy on the side of the head*
Beardy: ‘Ow, knock it off!’
Demon: ‘Oh no! Who let Tidus near the Jack Daniels?!’ We all know how he gets.’
Beardy: ‘Ryudo I told you that you shouldn’t have eaten all those curries, no, not there, for the love of Eden, don’t go there!’
Demon: ‘Clean up on Aisle 3’
Beardy: ‘Somebody stop the madness!’
Demon: ‘Look there he goes, doing his impression of a lamp stand again; Tidus take the lampshade off your head and put your clothes back on!’
*They retreat to the safety of behind the scenes where they find Telemnar reading ‘Which God’ magazine*
Beardy: ‘Ah, Telemnar at least you’re not involved in any of this’
Demon: * In Telemnar’s ear* ‘Khonsu’s back is turned; hit him with the apple pie now!’
Beardy: ‘Demon!’
Demon: ‘Excuse me; do I interrupt you when you’re trying to your job?’
Beardy: ‘Frequently, in fact you have interrupted me on no less then 2653 occasions…’
Demon: ‘Why are you changing the subject here? Just ask the kid about the storyline already’
Beardy: ‘Yes, well Telemnar would you mind sharing some details with us about the Key to the Fallen Star?’
Telemnar: ‘Come on guys, you know I can’t do that, it would spoil the whole thing for the readers and then what would be the point of them reading the story?’
Beardy: *Looking back out onto the party* ‘Oh no, now Tidus is on the dance floor and Seriges has just told Khonsu that robes are for hippies…’
Demon: ‘Come on boss, just a little sneak peek’
Telemnar: *Smiling* ‘Ok then. The key is to my shed where I keep the lawnmower of doom. I then use the lawnmower of doom to stop Melfice’s army of evil flowerpot men and thereby destroy his evil empire’
Demon: ‘Wow, really?’
Telemnar: *Shaking his head* ‘Demon, before the next chapter look up the word gullible in the dictionary’
Beardy: *Still focused on the party* ‘My lord, don’t you think we’ve let this go on long enough? Darius is now hanging from the rafters.’
Telemnar: ‘I suppose you’re right Beardy.’ *Stands up, hands glowing, ready to restore some order* ‘I can’t tell you much about the upcoming storyline, but I can tell you one thing.’
*Turns to audience and smiles*
‘With a cast like this it’s going to be one hell of a ride!’
Thanks again to the readers for reading, participating and enjoying the first 30 chapters of Telemnar’s Tale. May there be many more.