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Solar's Story
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08-31-2004, 4:49 |
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XSOLARX
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I'm in sane. It's a funny place.
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Insane Senior Member
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old karma : 436
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Well, here it is. The next chapter.
ENJOY!
Chapter 4: The meeting.
The next day I set my people to work and went away, to learn how to use the new miracles. Every now and then I felt that the god was looking at me. His aura was blue, but I couldn’t see his symbol. He seemed to radiate a cold dislike for the world. Every time he looked at me I felt cold. I wondered when he would make a move.
I went to a small forest. ‘Well, lets start with the water miracle, shall we? It is one of the miracles, which have changed leader.’ Beardy popped in sight. ‘Well, what has changed exactly?’ I asked. ‘Well, you use your finger to spray the water. You see that lonely tree?’ I looked and saw the tree Beardy was talking about. Demon popped in sight as well. ‘This is boring, boss. Why don’t you kill someone?’ I sighed irritated. ‘Demon, could you please be quiet for a while?’ I turned back to Beardy, who looked approvingly at me. ‘Think about the water miracle, leader.’ I thought about it and after a few moments I felt the power of the miracle flowing to me. Suddenly I noticed I didn’t have a hand! ‘Ehm, Beardy? Where’s my hand?’ Beardy looked as well puzzled. ‘You don’t need it, boss. Thanks to the Creed you can fire it from the core of your spiritual body. If you want a hand you must think of it.’
Beardy and I looked stunned at Demon. ‘WHAT?’ He asked. Beardy said: ‘Well, we’re not used of you giving intelligent answers.’ Demon looked irritated. ‘Thank you very much Beardy, but because just I’m ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) it doesn’t mean I’m dumb.’ I mentally apologised. He smiled at me.
I thought of a hand, and it immediately appeared. I aimed at the tree, and sprayed the water with such force it was uprooted and thrown into the sea. Beardy said timidly: ‘Slightly too much force, leader. But if you…’
Cruel laughter interrupted him. I spun around and saw the blue god. I could also see his symbol. His symbol looked like the face of a human, but it had two long teeth and strange, pointy ears. ‘Like my symbol?’ He said with a smirk. ‘It’s the head of a vampire.’ I remembered to have heard some stories about these creatures, but I could not remember when. ‘They feast on blood, boss.’ Demon smiled.
‘I never thought to meet a new god here. I’ll have to kill all unbelieving fools on this miserable island after all.’ He looked at me. ‘What is your name, newborn?’
‘What is YOUR name?’ I shot back at him, quite angry. Newborn, how dared he? I could crush him were he floated. He smiled at me. ‘A god who isn’t a coward! I like that. Very well. I am Marrvic, one of the strongest gods ever. By the way, would you like to join my clan? I’ll be the leader soon enough.’ He laughed arrogantly. I asked: ‘What clan?’ He looked at me like I was the dumbest thing he had ever seen. ‘An ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) clan. What did you think it was? A ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) clan?’ He laughed again. I said calmly: ‘I won’t join an ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) clan, nor do I need to join. I have destroyed more ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) gods than you can imagine, so why would I want to join?’
He looked at me stunned. He quickly regained his smile, though I could sense he was furious. ‘Who are you then, hmm?’ I laughed. ‘I will be your doom if you’re not careful, for I am Solar, the one who destroyed Nemesis and many other ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) gods.’
He didn’t make a move, obviously too shocked to do anything. I laughed. ‘What did you say? Are YOU one of the strongest gods ever? Don’t make me laugh!’ He stared at me, furious but afraid, and suddenly he shot at me. I dodged him easily. He looked at me fearfully. I shot at him, and created a small spiritual shield around me. He hovered in the air for too long, and I easily bashed him to the ground. When he hit the ground the ground, the earth shook. I laughed. ‘Is that all you can do?’ He looked at me, angrier than I had ever seen him before, but his fear won from his anger, and he shot back to his City. ‘And stay away!’ I shouted after him.
Even as he fled he shouted: ‘I will take revenge!’ I thought of a fireball, and it shot towards him. It narrowly missed, but instead it went straight for the temple. The explosion made him cry of pain, and many building in the City were suddenly on fire. He wouldn’t bother me again for a while…
‘WHAHAHAHAAAAAA, WHAT AN IDIOT! He actually thought he could take you on! Way to go, boss!’ Demon looked happier than ever before. ‘I must say that WAS impressive, leader.’ Beardy looked at me, also smiling. ‘We will have to be careful though.’ He said, his smile fading a little. ‘He will certainly try to destroy us, and I feel that he IS quite powerful, even though you defeated him. He was unprepared this time, but he won’t be the next time. So we better prepare ourselves.’
‘So, shall we continue with my lessons?’ Beardy looked delighted. ‘Naturally! Now pay attention leader, to use the water miracle to water plants and such, you must concentrate on using less power.’ I grinned, and aimed at another tree…
I have no name for the next one yet, but I guess it will be written and posted soon. Please give me critism!
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08-31-2004, 16:41 |
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08-31-2004, 17:11 |
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AMAUNATOR_THE_REVEALER
More Flash than Substance
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If you don't see me... Well, then I'm not there!
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Junior Godlike Member
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old karma : 697
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first: ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) that you take the other name
second: The 'change into human' idea is fine by me ![Happy [:)]](/Emoticons/happy.gif) , flabberghast me!
third: done that ...
fourth: busy ![Happy [:)]](/Emoticons/happy.gif)
P.S back: I was on smallband last few days, so i saved up on MSN ![Happy [:)]](/Emoticons/happy.gif)
Well, there were some flaws in your writing, thought nothing that rereading can't mend. Let me point em out shall I?
When he hit the ground the ground, the earth shook If you would have reread this chapter then you would have easily avoided this one ![Happy [:)]](/Emoticons/happy.gif) .
angrier than I had ever seen him before this is just ridiculous ![Happy [:)]](/Emoticons/happy.gif) . You didn't know him, you never have, so it will be a lot of times you'll think you'll see him being 'the angriest he'd ever been'. It's your first encounter, try to dramatise it, but not make it an overstatement on first sight.
I find it hard to believe that Beardy didn't object to the burning of his village (all be it in small proportions). He was even happy? Don't bring on contradictions like this, i almost thought you were entering the ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) makes ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) subject (if you are ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) then even your ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) side is tainted and loves a murder or two in its time).
That's all, just small reminders really, but a human mind is easy to sidetrack ![Happy [:)]](/Emoticons/happy.gif) .
P.S: I'll be writing on my own next chapter too.
Bathing in eternal sunlight...  { Sig Made By SenileSkunk!}
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08-31-2004, 17:19 |
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BLUDGEONMAN
At your service.
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Derby, England
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Senior Member
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El Baron 254
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old karma : 97
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Originally posted by XSOLARX
Second, I still want to know what you think of the 'change into a human' idea.
Idea's been used often enough. Maybe not into a human but a demigod kinda thing.
Fourth, to all people who read my story: GIVE ME CRITISM! TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT WAS GOOD OR BAD!
Its all ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) . I don't like giving bad criticism. It means I have to read harder, and let the words get in the way of the story ![Silly [:p]](/Emoticons/silly.gif) Nice original plotline, particularly the way that the 'newborn' (or 'newly awakened' in this case) is mega powerful. One with the creeds and all that ![Big Smile [:D]](/Emoticons/grin.gif)
Keep it up.
Sole Destroying.
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08-31-2004, 19:30 |
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09-01-2004, 2:08 |
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Hello i dicided to post my god
Name: Tempust god of storms
Alignment: Neutral
Creature: Falcon named Thundrus
Creature Alignment: Neutral
Personality: a generaly kind god but has a quick temper and loves to get revenge on anyone who commits a crime.
Power, rank: dosent matter
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09-02-2004, 16:48 |
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09-02-2004, 20:16 |
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XSOLARX
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I'm in sane. It's a funny place.
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Insane Senior Member
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old karma : 436
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HERE IT IS! AFTER HOURS OF WORK THE FIFTH CHAPTER HAS ARRIVED AT LAST!
ENJOY!
Chapter 5: The past.
I looked to the land of my enemy. It had been over a year since we last met. He feared me, yet he was no coward. He would strike soon…
In this year I had learned how to use the miracles, how I could summon my hand, and what had happened to this world after I left.
After I left new gods had come, and war raged across the planet. After a while one of the gods created armies to help him conquer the world. Other gods did the same to protect themselves. Believers began to think it was an honour to fight in the name of their god. After a while large scale wars became normal, and huge armies fought each other.
War wasn’t taken to most of the Greeks, for they were my most loyal followers, and their lands, which were known as the Core Archipelagos, were heavily protected by my power, even though I wasn’t there anymore. They lived in peace, yet they prepared for war, for if it would come to their lands, they didn’t want to be defenceless…
And it came to them…
A few powerful ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) gods were led by one of the Elder Gods. This god was ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) to the core, and together with the members of his clan, they used their power to summon a god powerful enough to break through the powerful barrier I had created before I had left. He answered the summons. At once a wave of ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) spread over the planet, and this god became the most powerful god ever, even more powerful than I had ever been with the Creed. The gods who had summoned him swore to serve him eternally, and the Elder God of the clan became the greatest general of this god. The Elder God became known as the Slayer…
The summoned god became known as The Doomlord…
The god feared me for some reason, and decided all my followers should be killed, to make sure I wouldn’t return. So he prepared himself to destroy all my followers…
And this god used his power to create a breach in the barrier I had created. He quickly created a portal on the other side of the barrier, and his general, the gods of the clan and their armies rushed in, to destroy all the Greeks who believed in me. They attacked several islands and killed all the inhabitants before the Greeks could do anything about the onslaught. The defenders of the islands were annihilated with surprising ease, and the Greek Empire was in complete disarray. However, they were able to quickly evacuate many isles that were near the completely ruined islands. They quickly organised themselves, and when the gods were done with razing the islands at the borders, and went to the Core Islands; they were surprised to be halted by an organised gigantic army. This army destroyed no less than 5 armies before retreating, and it had fought against armies twice his own size, and won thanks to using clever strategies. After this had happened, The Doomlord was furious, and all of the gods of the clan started using their brains as well, but the Greeks were fierce defenders, and they resisted every move of the invading armies. The advance of the armies was very slow, and nothing could change that. Other gods came to this war as well. Most notable among these gods were an Elder God, his apprentice and his clan, who aided the Greeks. They were ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) , and they did battle against the foes of the Greeks. Many Greeks joined their armies. Now the ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) gods and their armies were pushed back out of their lands.
But The Doomlord wouldn’t give up so easily. Furiously he went to the battlefield and he took hundreds of gigantic armies with him. He and his armies crushed any resistance they could find, and the tables were turned. Many of the ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) gods were destroyed. But they still tried to stop this sudden advance. In the Greek Capital many ships were constructed, and many of the Greeks left to make sure that their tribe would survive…
Even in the last hours it’s glory, the Capital looked beautiful, powerful and impossible to be conquered. Many of the ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) gods had left, including the Elder God and his apprentice, but all had left armies to defend the last of the cities. A few of the ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) gods decided to stay, to fight the great ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) for the last time…
The siege went on for a few months, but it was only delaying the inevitable. Constant arrows, boulders and fireballs weakened the defence and when the walls were finally breached, the armies rushed into the Capital, and after a few hours the last of the Greeks was dead.
All the resistance had been crushed, and the last traces of a Greek Empire were razed to the ground. Many Greeks had either fled with the ships or with the ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) gods, but they would be hunted forever. Only one island remained intact. It was a small isle, but it was protected by another barrier, much more powerful than the first. What was on that isle even I don’t remember…
This all was told to me by Cratas, who knew the ancient lore better than anyone, for he was the keeper of the ancient tomes and scrolls, even before I had come back. The temple had been finished a while ago, and it was a huge tower, pearly white, and the most beautiful construction on the entire island. I liked to think in my temple. I loved to be at the top of my temple, were I could see the entire island through the windows. Here I could see anything Marrvic did. I would have to teach my followers how to fight, and soon as well. Marrvic wouldn’t wait until I was ready for him. With a grim smile I looked towards the land where I could see Marrvic teaching his stag how to lead his troops better. I would wait for his move, and when he made it, I would be ready.
Please write critism! Oh, and to all who read this, Amaunator is now officially my corrector for the second draft (if it comes). I don't know when the next chapter is coming, so you'll have to look at my sig or take a look over here once in a while.
Cya!
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09-03-2004, 6:36 |
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It was good, the extra time really paid off. I'd criticize a few things, but they aren't that important and I'm too lazy ![Big Smile [:D]](/Emoticons/grin.gif) .
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09-03-2004, 8:14 |
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09-03-2004, 15:04 |
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09-03-2004, 15:31 |
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09-03-2004, 17:02 |
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09-03-2004, 18:16 |
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09-03-2004, 18:35 |
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BLUDGEONMAN
At your service.
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Derby, England
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Senior Member
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El Baron 254
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old karma : 97
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Well I thought I'd make an attempt anyway. Its all on Kayssplace if you know where to look.
This is a big list of what to back up if you're going to do something drastic with BW and don't want to lose your profile by accident.
The drastic thing I think would be the easiest to do would be backup your profiles, uninstall BW and then reinstall it. After that you can insert your backed up profiles.
BE VERY CAREFUL DOING THIS! Make checklists to make sure you get everything you need. Having said that, even if you dont get all the files, make sure to get the creature ones 'cos we all know how much of an arse it is training the little sods.
This is the audio fixer. I had the problem you had and this fixed it. No problem, aye?
![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) luck.
Sole Destroying.
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09-06-2004, 14:40 |
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09-06-2004, 14:57 |
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09-07-2004, 15:18 |
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09-08-2004, 16:00 |
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XSOLARX
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I'm in sane. It's a funny place.
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Insane Senior Member
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old karma : 436
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I've got more than 400 views, B&W has been back-upped succesfully...
I've no excuses left...
I guess I'll have to post a new chapter now...
SO ENJOY!
Chapter 6: When ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) plans go wrong.
‘Men! You are absolute rubbish! How do you think to defeat the enemy, if you can’t even raise a sword properly? Pay attention, and try harder!’ The Weaponmaster of the City was training the recruits tirelessly. The recruits knew how to fight, and they knew it well, but they had to be better if they wanted to be my elite. They were training to become the Sunblades, and I wanted them to be the most powerful warriors ever. Their training was very hard, but they all kept going. Mastering the sword, spear, bow and shield, while wearing heavy armour wasn’t easy. And they had to run for hours at a time while fully equipped. I smiled, for I knew that Marrvic’s army would be crushed. Only his creature was a real problem. I didn’t have one, and I didn’t know where to find one. I knew I once had a creature, but I had forgotten nearly everything about him, even his name.
I mentally summoned my conscience. Only Beardy appeared. ‘ ![Good [Good]](/Emoticons/good.gif) morning, leader. Why did you summon us?’ I said carefully, not to make him think I didn’t care about him: ‘Only you are here Beardy. Where is Demon?’ Beardy looked around. ‘Hmm. You’re right, leader. Just a minute.’ He disappeared. Seconds later he popped in sight again. ‘Well?’ I asked him. ‘He’s on the phone, leader. He’s got a mobile one. Apparently it’s called like that. Don’t ask me what it is or where he gets it.’ He said when he noticed my surprise. ‘Last thing I heard him say was: ‘YES, MOM! I wear other underwear everyday! YES, CLEAN UNDERWEAR! I’ve to go, mom! My god is calling me! No, I don’t work too much!’ I guess it was his worried mother.’ Beardy smiled, while I was laughing. Demon suddenly popped in sight. ‘What are you laughing at?’ Demon looked suspiciously at Beardy. ‘How’s your mom?’ I asked, still laughing. Demon froze, and then he started shouting at Beardy. I laughed even louder, and after a while I said: ‘Can we now start talking about what I wanted to talk about?’ Beardy look innocently at me. ‘That’s why we came, leader.’ Demon looked angrily at Beardy, while saying: ‘Yeah.’
I immediately started asking about my creature, but they knew as little about it as I did. Then I decided to ask if they knew a way to stop the wolf. Demon immediately said: ‘Fireball him until he's dead! Throw stones at him! Use lightning! Let your villagers fire countless arrows at him!’ Beardy said calmly: ‘As much as I disapprove his ideas, we must stop him before he can do some real damage. Using fireballs and such should do the trick.’
I looked at my enemy’s land. Marrvic wasn’t watching his stag for once. I knew I wouldn’t get many opportunities like this one. I quickly raised the totem of the City to make the villagers worship. I could cast miracles without prayerpower, but it would cost my own energy, and I would need it if I would enter his territory. I then started meditating. The sun increased my power even further. After an hour of meditation I felt ready.
I used all my power to create an enormous and extremely powerful fireball. I had difficulty to keep it in control. Marrvic seemed to have noticed nothing. I charged my powers, and then shot towards his land, towards his creature. Marrvic turned around, and he saw me, but he was too late to do anything. As I neared the stag, I used my last powers to throw the fireball. The stag couldn’t even try to dodge it…
And the result was stunning…
A gigantic explosion shook the ground, and flames enveloped the stag. His screams were unbearable. ‘NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!’ Marrvic looked shocked, terrified, and afraid. Afraid for his creature. After less than 10 seconds the stag collapsed. Where he had stood, there now was a crater, filled with lava. Everything that had been there was heavily burned, if not pulverised. The stag had a hole in his belly, and blood was streaming out. ‘WAY TO GO, BOSS! YOU SHOWED HIM!’ An extremely happy Demon and a saddened and shocked Beardy popped in sight. ‘Why did you do this, leader? This is extremely ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) !’ I sighed. ‘Look, I accidentally used too much force, so give me a break. I certainly didn’t want this.’ I heard a sound behind me, and turned around.
Marrvic stared furiously at me. ‘How dare you, to kill my creature?’ He hissed. ‘How dare you? YOU WILL SUFFER!’ Unlimited hatred fuelled his glow, and I could hardly see. ‘Fortunately, my creature can be revived. And when he is, I’ll lay siege to your pathetic City, and crush it under my heel!’ I actually felt fear, for the first time since I had returned. My plan hadn’t removed a dangerous factor; it had added an extra one. Instead of just having to deal with an army and a creature, I now had to deal with a powerful angry god as well. I turned around and fled back to my territory.
‘YOU WILL BE DESTROYED!’ Marrvic’s voice came.
I was in trouble now, and really deep as well. I now knew I had only one chance to defeat Marrvic…
I had to find my creature.
Please give critism!
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09-08-2004, 16:13 |
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ooo...shiney..11/10
Time for you to add another God...<_<
Name: Zaire
Creature: ![Evil [Evil]](/Emoticons/evil.gif) Tiger( Named Gozar! )
Allignment: Accidently
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09-08-2004, 17:39 |
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09-08-2004, 19:37 |
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That was good, but I think a fireball is more immolation that concussion. And seems to me that Marrvic was already pretty tiked to begin with.
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09-08-2004, 20:15 |
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09-09-2004, 14:48 |
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Yeah I aggree It would be better if he was just consumed by the fire not blown to shreds couse you can do that with a fast flying rock...
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09-09-2004, 17:26 |
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