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sameexact thing happened to me earlier in the game and still can't resolve it
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Ok, I married Lady Grey and completed the game with no problems what-so-ever.
However, at some point while I was doing the explorer thing with the Knot-hole Island expansion she disappeared. I never gave her a second ring and my daughter is still responsive. As far as the upkeep and happiness she is very happy I even still get quests to ...